CATALYST FIRST CHRISTIAN CHURCH OF HYPOCRITES OF BALDWIN COUNTY
FAIRHOPE MEMBER
We, the First Christian Catalyst Church of Fairhope CCCF, are gathered here today to mentally co-mingle with one another on the subject of Christian Values. Our congregation is in the midst of a political takeover of the church’s selected candidates for political office in Baldwin County.
As you all know, our brother member, Tim Can’t, was defeated and Fairhope has now in control of a Public Servant, that cannot happen. Since the election Church members have done everything they can to disrupt the Fairhope Government and attack the Mayor, they have failed so far, however they have pledged to keep the bullying and obstruction, front and center.
This Fairhope branch of the CCCF, is particularly proud of our City Council Members, and senior good ole boys, who are present today. Despite allegations of wrong doing, ranging from various obvious conflicts of interests, hiding business ventures under LLC’s, police reports involving crimes against juveniles, bid rigging and the exclusive and lucrative contract, a certain member received; we have stuck together and made Catalyst proud . I remind all of you that when you are under fire, deflect, reject and obstruct. Fire back with issues like schools, police, boat ramps, and armed Police at public schools; that always works. The tried and true subject of high taxes is synonymous with illegal immigrants and sanctuary cities.
That brings to mind our Mission Trip to Mexico… we will be extending that by a week, to a two week trip, so members may integrate with the locals; please leave your donation at the door
Today we wish to acknowledge our Catalyst City Council member who has filed yet another merit less complaint against the Fairhope Mayor. I know past complaints have failed; however our sister church in Bay Minette, has parishioners in high places.
A CCCF member for years and a true and loyal Catalyst member for years runs the newspaper. We pray today that the public servants and vast population is asleep and we thank the local radio station and tabloid paper for all their support in providing slanted news to the limited audience they represent. Praise be Johnathan Armstrong and his continued support, on social media.
Enough about Fairhope, let us move on to our esteem Catalyst Hippocrates running for County Commission and State Senate.
The County Commission race for place 3 is a doozy. We have had this seat secured by one of our most loyal Catalyst members for years. Unfortunately he has become too successful and his business interests are becoming public. I stand before you today and praise God for such a Hippocrate! He will be missed. Even I will admit it is hard to run a skunk against a peach, please show him the exit door.
As you know once a year, CCCF gives an award to the most unethical Hypocrites in our Catalyst Church. I am Proud to say Mr. Elliott has far exceeded any of the competition. When it comes to using the facade of being a Christian, no one I repeat no one, has out-done Mr. Elliott’s campaign. He has raised over $500,000 from special interest groups and his negative media platform hits every commandment of CCCF.
His attack on his opponent could not make us more proud. His campaign manager also represents the Baldwin County Schools. The School Superintendent, as well as the Sheriff, have joined their fellow Catalyst member in support. This allowed the wool to be pulled over the teachers eyes while getting support from the Superintendent and Sheriff. This move should go in our CCCF political handbook for hypocrites.
His manipulation of facts, promises and accomplishments have reached a new low, Please a round of applause. I close today with on short message, CATALYST and CCCF forever.
The closing hymn will be sung by the infamous Judge Thomasson, aka Catalyst Queen, please sing along as you exit,
“ALL THE CHILDREN”
VOTE JULY 17th It is up to you join the church or VOTE THEM OUT.